Saturday, April 17, 2010

Couple Wed in a Funeral Home

It generally has flowers, and a clergyman is often present, but this was a first for a local funeral home. Jason and Rachael Storm held their wedding at Starks and Menchinger Family Funeral Home, where he is a funeral director.

Their reception, including dinner and dancing, also was held at the funeral home. “This room is usually filled with sadness and contemplation, but today it is filled with joy and celebration,” the Rev. Greg Prather said at the start of Saturday's ceremony.

Jason Storm, 24, doesn't see much difference between getting married in a church or the funeral home. “I look at it as, if you go to a church and get married, how many caskets do you think have been rolled down that aisle?” he told The Herald-Palladium of St. Joseph.

Rachael Storm, also 24, said the location did “not creep me out at all.” “I'm very accustomed to what he does. The one thing I'm very much about is being unique,” she said.

Not everyone was entirely comfortable with the idea. Rachael Storm said some invited guests initially refused to attend, but the couple assured family and friends there would not be any caskets or corpses in the room.


Thursday, April 15, 2010

Weird Funeral News About Urns

The Personal Urn is an eerie recreation of your head, with space inside for your remains. Just imagine an artist's rendering of your eyes gazing eternally on your kids, grandkids, great-grandkids, and so on . . . at least until one of your descendants sells the house and leaves you in it. Because, really, who wants to bring that creepy staring head with them?

It costs $2,600, but there's a smaller version available for $600. Call it "Mini You."

Meanwhile, an alert reader at The Consumerist found a direct link to what appears to be the manufacturer,, who has a whole line of lifelike recreations of your head that can be used for everything from pencil holders to a head with a fake brain in it, just for laughs. These are much cheaper than the urn.


Sunday, April 11, 2010

Death of The Goldfish

Little Tim was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence.

Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he politely asked, "What are you up to there, Tim?"

"My goldfish died," replied Tim tearfully, without looking up, "and I've just buried him."

The neighbor was concerned, "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?"

Tim patted down the last heap of earth then replied, "That's because he's inside your stupid cat."

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Weird Funeral News from Philadelphia

The blue suit and black boots were right, but mourners at a retired trucker's funeral suspected they were gazing at the wrong man.

Some friends and family members kissed the body, despite whispers that something seemed amiss.

After a two-hour viewing Tuesday, the funeral home came clean: It had brought in the wrong casket to the church.

After the revelation, neither Kenneth "Tex" Roberts' family nor the body were in any shape for a final farewell, so the service was postponed.

"They tried to make us believe that it was him. I was so sure that it wasn't," widow Janie Holsey, 62, told The Associated Press on Wednesday. "But ... I've never handled anybody that died."

The man in the casket looked older and taller than Roberts, an 80-year-old Army veteran known for his playful spirit and eagerness to lend a hand.

Holsey insists that she questioned the funeral home.

"I know he didn't look like that," Holsey said. "It was a fiasco ... a nightmare."

The James L. Hawkins Funeral Home Funeral Home, which handled arrangements, declined to comment. The family of the other man involved in the switch did not immediately return a message left by The Associated Press on Wednesday.

Roberts, who had 11 children and stepchildren, had been relatively healthy until his death Monday of apparent heart problems, said Holsey's sister, Edith Nelson.

"Everyone enjoyed him. He was just so funny. He made everybody laugh," she said.

Amid the chaos of the casket-switch Tuesday, two of Roberts' 56 grandchildren collapsed and were taken to hospitals. A grandson, a young adult with a history of seizures, remained hospitalized Wednesday, but a granddaughter with asthma troubles was released, Nelson said.

The family is now making new plans for his burial. They hope to arrange a proper funeral for their patriarch.

"We don't want to make two mistakes," Holsey said.